Living intentionally

I think living life the way that you want to is something that a very small percentage of people actually get to do. Not caring if what excites you and makes you happy, might concern or even upset someone else. This. This is the key, THEY have an issue NOT YOU. Easier said than done but really if you want to wear a sundress and everyone else is wearing jeans and a top what are the chances you go with your intuition, your first pick, and didn’t care about what anyone else was wearing. Somehow someway we got programmed into thinking we need to all try and be similar. Similar life, similar timelines. Go to public school, travel some, marriage, buy a house, start a family. But what if you’re not like the rest of them…

I am sharing this just in case anyone feels like they have to fit into a mold that they did not have a say in. You are the creator of your own destiny and life. You can literally do ANYTHING. Will you be good at everything. No. But you may just come across something that sparks a Little Flame and fucking run with it and does not let anyone touch it! Seriously I feel like my life took a 180 when I stopped trying to be what other people perceived and started doing what I love. Anything in Nature, homemaking, staying home with my son, blogging, fashion, and the list goes on and on. I do not feel as one is more important than the other I just feel full and grateful that they all work together to create my unique life. If we intentionally spend our time and money only on what we truly want. That is when we win. Thankyou so much for reading! Just be yourself! πŸ•Š

All photos by @downtoearthphotography

The top is @shopentourage on Instagram

Spring fever

Springtime is always very anticipated at least in our home. It’s a time for new adventures, warm weather, and more sunshine! This pullover lightweight sweater is absolutely perfect for any plans during the warmer but not quite summer weather. It’s so cute and cozy but not too warm! Shop this top at Elkmont trading company in Clemson, SC or online. It would be the perfect weekend top for anything indoors or my favorite, outdoors! I was thinking just being outside 1X every day has to lower stress and anxiety. It just makes you have to be present. Which may be difficult to do in our electronic run, millennial era. I think making a priority for outside time is the key! As a family, we try to at least go outside after or before dinner if we haven’t had a chance to that day. Like this past weekend, we were outside after dinner while my husband was doing some yard work. The sun was shining down, our wind chimes blowing, Bowen was just running around the yard with our dog. And I was able to sit back and take it all in. This is my life. I am blessed beyond measure to have a healthy and happy family. It was one of those golden nugget moments! I encourage you to give into the spring fever and do someone you want to go do outside. This time of year is always so fun to plan family fun activities and now that our son is old enough we will be planning a lot more. You can do anything you set your mind to! Thank you for reading and enjoy your day! πŸ•Š

#blogmama #bloggerstyle #scblogger

All photos by @agcampphotos on Instagram

Clothing is all @elkmonttradingcompany on Instagram

The perfect summer dress

Photos by @agcampphotos on Instagram.

Shop this dress is @shopentourage on instagram

White summer stroll dress

I have been wanting to incorporate more fashion posts on my blog and spring\summer seem like the perfect time! Especially here in South Carolina, we have already had a few almost 80Β°f days! I am not complaining though I love the heat and the sun, and this dress is perfect for just that! I am a tad biased because I LOVE a good dress during the warmer months. People say “oh wow, you’re dressed up” No, no I just threw on one single garment but thank you! Haha! Really though this dress is so cute and feminine it hits about 3″ inches above the knee and the backless feature is just my favorite! I go braless because well I go braless 95% of the time but you could wear a backless bra if you wish! So whether you are playing with the family all day or running around town shopping this dress IS IT! Thanks for reading. πŸ•Š

Best tips for toddler Temper Tantrums

Photos by @downtoearthphotography on Instagram

Clothing is @shopentourage on Instagram

Understanding Tantrums

I worked at a daycare for 2 years in and out of the toddler classrooms. I have a two-year-old son who has also taught me a lot about toddlers and their many emotions (usually justified). When children hit around age 2 they begin to test their limits and boundaries of life. They are growing, learning and developing. Also, communication is limited but receptive language is soaring. Toddlers are starting to understand very well but can not express themselves or most ideas verbally yet. Frustrating. Then Naturally, they are going to make mistakes (part of learning anything new) and how we react to them is a direct correlation with how they will react. For example, if our child makes a mess with a toy or food we could react by shouting and scowling. Or we could ask them why they did it and explain why they should not have made that choice. This takes more time and energy but in the long run, teaches a lesson and gives the child an understanding. Instead of scaring and degrading them. You have to think about children as yourself how would you want to be treated at that age? Or now? Would you yell at your spouse or friend for making a mess?

Egnologing their feelings

If you were crying and someone who was trying to comfort you says “oh you’re fine”. You’re probably not going to confide in them again. Same with our children the only difference is we feel as adults that they should have “control” and suppress feelings at a young age. If my two-year-old is upset because he wants something in a store that he can not have, because we don’t give him whatever he wants, he is not being a brat he is upset that he can not get his way. Our JOB is to teach how to cope with these feelings. I usually say I see you really wanted that thing, I know it is frustrating not to get what you want. But and then go on to explain you have plenty of you to play with or whatever.

Finding a solution

Okay, this is just as important a the first two steps to you will just be repeating the same thing over and over. So after you have understood what your child is upset about, now you can move on to finding a solution. This might look like “I know you want this but we can not get that and I know that makes you upset but we can eat these snacks I brought until we’re done at the store. Almost a distraction but you are still doing the 3 keynotes. This technique has worked for me and I hope it works for anyone else! πŸ•Š

*Disclaimer: I am not an expert childcare specialist. If you need advice on what to do, talk to your medical provider. This is simply my opinion and experience.

3 tips to finding Joy

1. Not caring what other people think.

This is much easier said than done, but also the most beneficial tip. If we walk around taking others dreams, ideas, fears, or insecurity is it really living for yourself? Life is so so short and we do not want to waste our time! You always hear elders talk about what they ‘wished’ they would have done. What if as a society we stopped all the self-doubting and just chased our own unique dreams? That’s when things finally felt like I was in control of the joy I felt in my life. When I stopped listening to outsiders who (even with best interest at heart) do not know my heart and my desires.

2. Go with your gut

This is a goodie. Whatever we decide to do in this life I pray it lights a fire and brings peace and joy. Oh, that feeling you get when you’re succeeding at something you love! Isn’t that the best? I think tip numbers 1 and 2 tie into one another. What I mean by this is if something excites you or interest you and you have the ability to do it. Do it. Life is all about what you make it. There are so many opportunities headed our way if we would just have faith and go for it then who knows maybe we can achieve it!

3. Be present and be patient

This is kinda a 2 for 1 lol. Staying present and being patient is extremely difficult for me. I have always been a goal setter. Looking for the next best thing! So staying content and just taking in the present is sometimes challenging. Laying down the electronics and going outdoors seem to be how I achieve this every day. Patience, on the other hand, has never come easy. I have prayed and prayed and I think the Lors himself is just waiting on me to get it through my thick head! But seriously meditating, being in nature and just slowing down seems to always uplift my day. I hope this brings someone a little happiness. πŸ•Š #joyfilled #positiveenergy #manifestation #blogmom

πŸ“Έ Photo by @downtoearthphotography on Instagram

My natural hair journey

My hair prologue

I’ve attached a few photos through the years of my hair journey. From relaxers from 2006-2014 about every eight weeks! If you are thinking of going natural or transitioning to natural hair, do it!! It is so much better for you and your hair! It’s about the same price too just more time, and your hair will look better I guarantee it! I big chopped December 23, 2015! Unplanned the day before Christmas eve lol! I loved it! You are beautiful naturally! We do not need to change how we are to fit into society. I personally want to be the damn right opposite of our Millennial beauty standards! I’m so over big tots, big ass, big lips, and flat hair like okay it’s been done, honey. I had people make fun of me in school for my little short afro but 100% of those people are irrelevant now. Funny how that works. Something seems so monumental at the moment and two months later you can’t even remember so and so’s the name! Best not to waste your energy getting upset. So please if you’re thinking about it I urge you to watch YouTube videos on natural hair journeys! I probably watched over 50, they are super helpful! This is how the hair grows naturally out of our head! Why change it?

Tips for transitioning to natural hair

1. These tools I use daily. A Wide tooth comb, denim brush, boar bristle brush, satin pillowcase.

2. Find youtubers or bloggers with similar hair texture for inspiration.

3. Do not hang on to those ends sweetie they’re already dead. I recommend seeing a professional hair stylist!

4. Do not care what others think. They ALWAYS have an opinion. And it has NOTHING to do with you.

5. Leave in, oil, cream. This is for every time you wash and style. I always do these three steps. (Just find the best ones for you and stick to those you don’t need 700577839 products.

6. Deep condition as much as possible.

7. Find your favorite protective styles that are easy and nonmanipulative.

8. FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR HAIR!! If you don’t how do you expect others to? Peace and blessings also patience is key! πŸŒΏπŸ•Š #naturalhair #curlyhair #naturalhairjourney #blogmom

Freshly relaxed hair from the salon obviously broken and brittle
Relaxed hair had been transitioning for about 1 year
Okay, this was relaxed air dried hair! Omg just no! Along with semi-perm hair dye and chlorine from the pool.
Alright, this is when I intentionally started transitioning to natural hair this was the first time I wore my hair “natural” in front of my peers. I got so many compliments that day lol
Big chop December 23, 2015, I was so done with two textures and my stringy dead ends!!
Senior photos!
My hair started growing a lot faster!!
Engagement photos with my little TWA!

Photo by kilylaurenphotography

This is where I’m currently at in December 2018!!! It has been a journey that’s for sure!!!

πŸ“Έ Photos credits by @sarahdmock on Instagram

By @kileyylauren on Instagram

By @brownkaitlyne on Instagram

By @aswinchester23 on Instagram

Raising children your own way

Parenting. It’s exhausting and hard, but also rewarding and magical. Without getting into the nitty-gritty my husband and I both wanted our family dynamic to be very different than that which we were brought up. Not completely but for the most part, our parenting styles were not the same as our parents. So we both had to start from scratch. I worked as a babysitter/nanny and then at a daycare before having my son so I had some idea of the style of parenting I preferred. My husband is a very go with the flow personality and I feel like his parenting styles shifted as he gained knowledge of different parenting styles.

Parenting style

Everyone is going to parent differently because every child and every circumstance is different. We prefer and believe in respectful parenting, mixed with some child lead and gentle parenting tactics. Obviously, we do not crack open a book every time our 21-month-old throws a tantrum but we try and abide by the guidelines these parenting books layout. There are so many resources today. The internet being the biggest and broadest, but something about touching, smelling, and reading an actual book that is so satisfying. It’s like this is in a book! There was a lot of money and time invested in this. So in my opinion this book is more reliable than maybe some internet article (ironic). I always do research on both ends of course. That is the only way to collect real research,but I would recommend checking out your local library and browsing the parenting sections. You may be surprised what goodies you find! πŸ•Š #blogmom #respectfulparenting #marriagegoals #family #outdoor

Resources

I am currently not finished with these books yet. I will finish them though! I use the table of contents a lot and read all around in each book to applicable chapters or pages. Another great resource is podcasts! I use the double pod app. Just type your parenting styles in the search engine and you can browse and listen to them for free!

Newbies guide to positive parenting by Rebecca Eanes

How Children Learn by John Holt

All photos on the post

Instagram: @throughthelookingglassphotography