Mom guilt is a real thing. In my experience, it seems to hit when I finally find time for myself without my son. Now I stay home all day every day with him except next week he will start at preschool 4 hours 2X a week. But my point is there is not a reason to feel this guilt about having a date night and calling a sitter (his grandparents). He will have a good time with his grandparent’s bonding and i should be enjoying my bonding time with my amazing husband. This mindset is not going to allow for the peace that i intended when setting up some alone time. So how do you help these thoughts and feeling go away?
Make sure you and your children feel secure about leaving
Try and focus on what you are doing at the moment
Remember why you decided the alone time was desired
Life is often referred to as a balancing act. Many times we as humans keep ourselves busy with different tasks and interests that we can feel like we are falling short in an area. That is not a feeling I want, instead of figuring out the steps to take to feel at peace and balanced. I have three points when moving toward this goal.
Pinpoint your desires
Really figure out what you want in life. Broadly. Your family, your home, your career, your hobbies, your legacy. Now that I have “goals” for the future. I can better analyze my life now to see if everything is moving toward these goals or maybe hindering them.
Know your priorities
If you keep doing something or going somewhere or being around someone you do not care for. Stop. Just stop it. No need to be dramatic just stop living your life to please others. You have your own goals, responsibilities, and ethics no need to take on any others. Try and keep your focus on what you want and how youre going to make it happen. This kind of tricks your brain into finding opportunities you may otherwise not notice. Know your own priorities.
Stay present and have gratitude
Stay present and be grateful sounds so simple but can be tricky. For some reason, humans are always thinking ahead. This can obviously cause a distraction of the real goal. To be present. For example when you are sweeping the floor do not think about what youre doing after, only think about sweeping the floor. It sounds silly but this is a big one for training your brain to focus on what you tell it. As far as gratitude just pass on kindness and help to people as much as you can. Treat others how you would want to be treated and be grateful for what you have now and where you are now. Thank you for reading! 🕊
Have a routine
Morning and nighttime routine is a must for children they strive off of consistency. You do not have to be strict and exact everyday but doing the same tasks in the same order every morning can help get the day started off by feeling g accomplished. A nighttime routine maybe a warm bath, Jamie’s, milk and a story before bed. This is a perfect way to get there little minds ready for bedtime.
This is my number one struggle because I am enthusiastic by nature. Of course when a child is upset or crying you want to remain calm to help them through. But even more interesting I have found my son does better with a calm atmosphere in general. No electronics, simple toys, a low slow tone in my voice. He responds much more calm which makes total sense. If you find yourself dealing with alot of meltdowns one day try being extra calm almost like a yoga instructor voice and see how your little responds.
Make mundane tasks feel special
I do this every day. I wake up make my coffee open a window and just have my morning time to myself. This makes doing chores around the home just feel like I am sipping coffee and having me time not housework. If you are moping try listening to some fun dance music. You can always make the say a little more upbeat and special!
Love, when in doubt just love them
If all else fails and I just can not win that day. Grace and love always wins even through a tantrum I can hold him in a safe position until he is calm and just hug him and tell him I am here. We are not perfect and neither are our little people. If we could just treat them how we would want to be treated and meet them with love and understanding then we will be able to teach our child in the ways we want. When I was young my mother told me she loved me one or two times that I can remember same for hugging and kissing. I make sure to hug and kiss my son everyday multiple times as well as tell him how much I love him and how amazing he is. Thankyou for reading beautiful people! 🕊
Romper: entourage clothing and gift
Bodysuit: entourage clothing and gifts & @shopentourage on Instagram.
The springtime here in South Carolina is more like summer. It is not uncommon to hit the 80’s in May and be well in the 90’s until September. So I usually go for flowy outfits. That means shorts and jeans just won’t do it for me. A dress, a jumpsuit, or a ROMPER is the way to go in my opinion. My summer wardrobe mostly consist of these items! Not only are these pieces comfortable but so extremely easy to style! You can wear them casually or dress them up with some fun jewelry and heels! Either way having a few staple rompers in your arsenal will make picking out a cute outfit effortless! Thank you for reading! 🕊
I think living life the way that you want to is something that a very small percentage of people actually get to do. Not caring if what excites you and makes you happy, might concern or even upset someone else. This. This is the key, THEY have an issue NOT YOU. Easier said than done but really if you want to wear a sundress and everyone else is wearing jeans and a top what are the chances you go with your intuition, your first pick, and didn’t care about what anyone else was wearing. Somehow someway we got programmed into thinking we need to all try and be similar. Similar life, similar timelines. Go to public school, travel some, marriage, buy a house, start a family. But what if you’re not like the rest of them…
I am sharing this just in case anyone feels like they have to fit into a mold that they did not have a say in. You are the creator of your own destiny and life. You can literally do ANYTHING. Will you be good at everything. No. But you may just come across something that sparks a Little Flame and fucking run with it and does not let anyone touch it! Seriously I feel like my life took a 180 when I stopped trying to be what other people perceived and started doing what I love. Anything in Nature, homemaking, staying home with my son, blogging, fashion, and the list goes on and on. I do not feel as one is more important than the other I just feel full and grateful that they all work together to create my unique life. If we intentionally spend our time and money only on what we truly want. That is when we win. Thankyou so much for reading! Just be yourself! 🕊
All photos by @downtoearthphotography
The top is @shopentourage on Instagram